Posts Tagged ‘Parenting’

Watch Over Me

Wednesday, March 31st, 2010

“There are thoughts which are prayers.  There are moments when, whatever the posture of the body, the soul is on its knees.”-Victor Hugo

watchovermeOn a lark I entered a contest on a similar site to Storybuzz called Shereads.org. And was pleasantly surprised to find myself the winner and recipient of two autographed books and a high quality box of chocolates.  I was instantly drawn to the cover of one novel titled Watch Over Me by Christa Parrish. It depicted a sweet baby staring directly at the reader over the shoulder of a woman.  Cheek to cheek with the baby, the woman’s hair in a ponytail, lent an air of fragility to the woman’s exposed back and shoulders.

The book opens when Deputy Benjamin Patil, local law enforcement and soldier who survived the Afghanistan war with the loss of his toes and his best friend finds an abandoned baby girl only hours old in a plastic grocery bag by the side of the river.

He and his wife Abbi, who are unable to have children, are chosen to be foster parents for her. But, their home is filled with stress and disagreement and may not be the ideal home for this baby. Between the tension of Benjamin’s trauma while serving in Afghanistan and his pacifist, hippie, vegan wife’s struggle with an eating disorder and her helplessness in the face of so much wrong between them.

Their lives intersect with Matthew, a deaf teenager, who suffers from several medical issues and comes from a troubled family. As Abbi and Benjamin continue to take care of the baby, more and more pain is revealed and their marriage struggles to survive.

“He heard Abbi come out of the bedroom, the swollen door opening with a sticky pop. Everything swelled in the heat. Problems. Fears. Sins. All puffed with humidity and ready to rain out with the slightest change in air pressure.”

Silvia, the abandoned baby brings a purpose into the Patil’s life. Named for a Shakespeare’s line, “Who is Silvia?  What is she, that all our swains commend her? Holy, fair, and wise is she; the heaven such grace did lend her, that she might admired be.” As baby Silvia brings Ben and Abbi together in a common cause, they soon learn that she’s only a bandage for their lurking problems. And they are forced to ask themselves, if they lose Silvia, will their marriage survive?

Parenting is explored in depth in this story. From Ben’s immigrant parents; To Matthew and his cousins being raised fatherless; Through Silvia’s abandonment and Abbi’s understanding of her dysfunction parent relationship.

Matthew is a precious character and carrying too much on his shoulders in this story.  If I talk as though they are real people, it is because Parrish made them seem so to me as I read their stories.  Caring for his young cousins as almost a father figure, while navigating through dialysis, he comes into the Patil’s life to mow the lawn and care for Silvia when Abbi does her pottery.  A strong believer and a math whiz, it is he who must figure out the most difficult equation in the story, who should ultimately parent Silvia.

“In pi he saw the reflection of God. Pi was constant, always the same – today, tomorrow, and forever. It was irrational, like the cross, foolishness to those who didn’t believe. It was transcendental; no finite sequence of operations on integers could ever create it. It never ended.”

The book takes on some heavy issues. Subjects like love, marriage, family, the church, forgiveness, identity and redemption are woven throughout this intoxicating story. Though it has many bleak moments, the story ends hopeful and personal. The reader fully invested not only in the characters but the ability of God to redeem the most unlikely situation…perhaps one in their own life.

GENRE: Realistic Fiction

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Lessons For Dylan

Wednesday, March 17th, 2010

“What I have to realize is that I might not be around when Dylan’s older. I may not make it, so I’ve been writing a history for him. There are things I want him to know. I want him to know about being Jewish. I had a lot of relatives killed in the Holocaust, but I want him to know he’s related to people who survived.”

lessonsfordylanGood Morning America’s long time movie critic shared with his son and readers what he’d learned in his very personal and inspiring memoir, Lessons For Dylan.

At the age of fifty-four, Joel Siegel both became a father for the first time and learned that he had cancer.  Fearing he may not live long enough for his long awaited child to know who he was, he began a story spanning his childhood, career, and the lectures every father expects to give their kids.

“If you fight back and get hit, it hurts a little while; if you don’t fight back it hurts forever.”

It is an interesting history depicting his path from an immigrant neighborhood to national television. He spoke at length about his work in the civil rights movement with both Martin Luther King Jr. and the political campaign of Bobby Kennedy who was assassinated in front of him. Siegel candidly addresses the more difficult passages of his life, including the end of his marriage to Dylan’s mother and the experience of having cancer. But he also shares great stories from show biz that include Orson Wells, Paul Newman, Brad Pitt, Stevie Wonder, and all four Beatles. He lays out the History of the Jewish People in Four Jokes; and offers fatherly advice on sex “ask your mother”, work, and what to cook for Rosh Hashanah with recipes included.  He even dedicated a whole chapter to all the Yiddish his son would need to know and why the Jews have over 29 words for “Schmuck.”

Most touching are later chapters entitled “I’d Give Anything to Take You to Your First Ball Game” and “Movies I Want to Watch With You” that really rang authentic and heart breaking as I pictured what legacy of words I would want to leave to my children.

“Of course this entire time Ena was pregnant with Dylan. I made very bad jokes about not knowing which of us was throwing up more.”

This memoir is a history lesson; it is a biography, and inspirational literature.  The day I closed the book on the last page I was compelled to sit a little longer and laugh a little more with the three precious kids in my own life.

Joel Siegel died from colon cancer on June 29, 2007 shortly before what would have been his 64th birthday. His family has said the last movie he saw was Ratatouille with his son.

GENRE: Biography

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How Starbucks Saved My Life: A son of privilege learns to live like everyone else

Wednesday, March 10th, 2010

howstarbucksThe 64-year-old big shot advertiser at JWT had it all and then lost everything when he was fired for being too old in Michael Gates Gill memoir, How Starbucks Saved My Life: A son of privilege learns to Live like everyone else.

Distressed and broke, Gates was drinking coffee at a Starbucks, thinking about his family life he had messed up, a brain tumor near his ear, which was making his hearing difficult and the financial crisis he was in when he was then offered job at Starbucks and everything changed.

Gates came across as a caricature of the Upper East Side aristocrat, raised in enough privilege to be completely divorced most of his life from feelings of economic insecurity. Peppered throughout the book are fascinating stories of his encounters with famous and powerful individuals. Gates went to Yale and got a job purely on connections through Skull & Bones, and then had a full, successful career without ever really learning math or how to handle money. These recollections are told as he masters his hour and a half commute each way by subway to his job in Starbucks, and during the hours he spends cleaning the stores toilets.

I enjoyed the basic epiphany of the journey – the realization that a supportive, friendly environment can in fact be a part of a great and successful company and workday. After reading how Starbucks offers health insurance, stock options, and a positive culture for its “partners,” I dreamed of working there myself.

Recognizing how he had previously ignored the poor, judged those in a class not his own, and confronted his own racism, Gates grows as an individual before the reader’s eyes.

“I promised myself that I would not get so pumped up with ambition or a crazy self-righteous pride in anything I did that I lost my perspective again.”

The author talks about “partners” and “guests” and “respect” to the point it got tedious and distracting at times.  This book is mostly about his experience at Starbucks, and you could get jaded to it if you believe that this book is just company propaganda.

Sometimes it’s hard to feel sorry for Gill considering the majority of what happens to him he did to himself. He’s the one who alienated his children and cheated on his wife, but his words are not self-deprecating. He doesn’t spend page after page making the reader understand how miserable his life was. He spends page after page explaining how the corporate culture of Starbucks transformed his life and the lives of his New York co-workers.

I am happier than I have eve been…I could feel a kind of gentle, inner happiness I had never felt before…I was almost scared; still afraid to admit to myself how happy I was now with a job as a barista at Starbucks…I had to admit that I felt great relief in the different life I had now…even my little apartment.”

Tom Hanks has already grabbed the movie rights to the book.  Readers looking for a short, quick, and heartfelt read will enjoy this book.

GENRE: Non-Fiction

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